7/20/2014

I'm back back back....


Hello, my beloved hornies, twinks, bears, studs, gays and gayderellas or what have you! I've finally got an opportunity to take some time to prepare an entry about my vacation that I spent in Turkey last week. Gosh, it seems like the world has turned upside down and back. there are so many things I want to share, and there's been so many things in my head I'm looking forward to tell you! Helas...Till I'm earning my bread working like a galley slave, I won't be able to blog as much as I'd like to. 
If you ask me to find just one word to express my first biggest impression of Istanbul, I'd say...hmmmm...rrrr....
No, I'm at a loss of words! This was F#CKIN' WAY TOO AMAZING and only new Dolce & Gabbana Collection for Alta Roma 2015 could ouddo them. Good Lord, I'd let a rich bastard buy MOIself on a slave market for just one great chance to parade on the bridge in Capri having my skirts carried by two hot Italian mucho macho slaves men like Stefano and Domenico undoubtedly are! I love them from the bottom of my heart!  Click to see more peeks:



Just like that: 

photo courtesy: buro 24/7

BTW, I've spent pretty much time desperately trying to find just something about the event, but it was supposed to be like a secret "TS!TS!" sh#t I guess and the only article I could find was prepared by one of the best fashion websites in Russia - Buro. I love Buro 24/7.
I'd die if some folks there ask me to b#tchface in front of the camera holding the infamous "I love Buro" card like they did with hoardes of celeb#tches  celebrities. What? Am I too demanding? One can't make a person stop dreaming, right?
There were some other collections which had been caught my blinking eye but let me start  later on that note.
Let's talk about ME, ME, ME!!!!! Okay, not me in general, but my trip! Nevertheless, here I am and here's my story.
Apart from the fact that I flew with the worst domestic airline ever (Yakutia!), my hotel which sucked, and bloody footsore  (forget what I wrote about PAOLO CONTE in the previous post. I hate 'em!) I got by the end of the trip,  everything was smooth and perfect.
I did everything I had planned before leaving for home. And there was even some space left for a huge surprise with a cherry on the top (but I can't talk about it though. Yes, even MOI, I must have my secrets, you know!).
Well, let me show you some things I LUUUURVED about Istanbul the most. They are enlisted in an alphabetical order. Alphabetical order? What is ABC?

#1 MOSQUES
I swear to good Lord, they are everywhere! There were more mosques all over the place than covered witches  gurls who go there! Having a sparse look at the Blue Mosque was one of the major things I planned to do there, so did I! But there were some other mosques I liked a lot. Not that I'm a religious b#tch, but I'm in truly love with the architecture and the golden signs in Arabic they have which is impossible to see in Russia! I even prayed inside the Catholic Church. Ok, of course I didn't pray -  I just faked that I prayed desperately thinking that I'll have been put mercy on for all the faggotry I radiate on a daily basis. I'm joking. I just wanted to take a good shot in church. It was the first time I visited the Catholic Church. I was impressed to bits though. Pity that I couldn't spot any hot popes who would f@ck my TWINK #ss there. LOL. Did I say it aloud? Sorry, then... Ha-ha...
Well, the mosques: 









# 2 FOOD
The food in Turkey was IS amazing. Portions were  ARE enormous and surprisingly cheap. Once we found a restaurant with a 'veranda' place on the top of the hotel or something and they charged Me and Mr. Big nothing but around 10$ for four dishes which were 500% yummilicious!!!! Service was  good: the stuff was extremeley polite at whatever place we popped by to eat. My best Turkish friend had advised me to visit the islands, so we went there together with Mr. Big and there was a place near the fish market I don't know (Heck, I'm sorry, I'm bad with names!), and I ordered rakia, and a salmon, and some grilled trout with a side dish of cherry tomatos, cucumbers, and their flat cakes they serve lo and behold for free with different sauces. I literraly died after that! Mmmmm....yum

#3 THE ARCHITECTURE

Just look at all these old coloured buildings! They have their own charm, no?













# 4 CARPETS -  TILES  - PORCELAIN & FAKE CELINE 'PHOEBE' BAG


Just ignore a plaster thing on my right foot.  It obz ruined the whole moment:





F#ck those motherf#ckers with a celery stalk who let them sell fake Celine bags! Come on, this is Phoebe  we are talking about! This is more legendary than all their gorgeous b#tches  beaches in Antalia. Is that LV? Is that Chanel? Is that Hermes? Is that PRADA there too? Noooooo waaaaay, burn in hell! I'd eat donkey's sh#t for PRADA! 


Ow-Mai-Gawd, I need some more rakia in my guts now to get rid of the stress! Ha-ha...

Revenons à nos moutons, dear friends! Close your eyes and tell me what my # 5 is going to be! Don't cheat! You'll win a kiss from MOI if you guess it right! NO, cheat!!!!  Seriously....





# 5 MOI in Istanbul, of course

Shirt (Elena Lichutina), vest (unlabelled, I bought it in 'OBNOVKA' shop), white espadrilles (not pictured, H&M)

Gosh, I love all the photos we took except this one above! I look so....so.....I dunno sad! F#ck my 'yeux cernés' and skin which is far from being flawless. It's impossible to have  immaculate skin when it's being tortured by that unbearable 40 Celsious heat. And even a black-and-white filter couldn't save me from a failure!
BTW, I'm wearing my new fav shirt which has a flower print combined with a newspaper pattern on it (Mister John Galliano the God of fashion, hello!!!!). Thanks to my mom, who made this gorgeous piece for me!!!

Photo via http://www.dashinfashion.com/

You can see the full reportage with my photos on Instagram. You know how to find me, right? And SUBSCRIBE SUBSRIBE SUBSCRIBE! I wanna beat MIRADUMA on the number of followers!!! I love you, Мирослава! I swear, I do! Once we'll binge in a gay club in Paris! JK. You know, you're the best b#tch fashion Grand Dame who rocks those MILAN-PARIS-LONDON street style pre-show things! And Ulyana Sergeenko rocks 'em too! (I'm obsessed with Ulyana's last collection inspired by Russian artists). You're my QUEENS!
Guys at L'Oreal Russia (I know you read this and I know you must know the girls in person!), plz tell them that I'm lovey-dovey for everything about their PERSONAS!!!!  And when I go to Moscow I want to take a peek with them! Both of them!  Or apart? It doesn't really matter! I don't like threesome bareback by all means! I just wanna touch them, feel their Chanel flair next to me (don't forget to mention  that I' a fash fag so that they don't think that I'm a perv freak. LOL). I promise to purchase only L'Oreal products (which I do on a regular basis) whenever I go to the mall then. Thanx! I'll be endebted forever!
On a different note, here's one more photo of  locally manufactured bags and shoes I liked and probably ask my friend to buy them for me when he goes to Istanbul next month. What do you think? Yes/no? E-mail me your answers. mchabale@yandex.ru



I just feel like after this post some designers (hint hint) will be inspired and create a collection inspired by Turkish culture. You'll see! Y'all know how I'm famous for that 'trend-teller' sense. CFDA, please hire me! I'll be the best STARBUCKS coffee deliverer ever. I will, I promise!!! I'll be giving you some fashion advice while breaks, if you're interested! Fashion advice? Who am I kidding though? I'll never work as a designer or even a stylist coz I don't have any mere skills in  crafts at all. And I'm absolutely left-handed when it comes to making things! All I can do is just admire other people's work, and buying, buying, buying after making other people buy, coz y'all know whose body a real material gurl really lives in. And it's not MADONNA!!! It's me. 
Ooh! I'm tired now....Needa good sex and some hot sperm  milk in my mouth before I go to bed! Wish me new trips! Wish me new love! Wish me everything cause I deserve it! I love y'all! Promise to come back tomorrow with some other stuff on my plate! Sweet dreams! 






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